Knuckles #11 [Apr 1998]

Spaz/Penders cover: Knuckles and Athair and the rest of the Tribe appear about to sample a king-size batch of chili, extra hot. Athair seems to have inherited Mammoth Mogul's "mechanical construct." I thought Sonic and Knuckles smashed it in the course of "Immortality is Forever and She's Buying the Stairway to Heaven" (#56). It doesn't play any part in the story, but it provides a convenient reason to use those green highlights.

"Covenant (The Forgotten Tribe, Part 2)"

Story: Ken Penders; pencil: Manny Galan; ink: Andrew Pepoy; color: Barry Grossman; lettering: Vickie Williams; Editorial: G-Force

Frontispiece/Credits page: OK, THAT'S Athair. And a nicely grouchy rendering of the old dude. Although the coloring job makes it look like he's wearing Life Savers(tm) in his dreads instead of rasta beads.

During my stint as reviewer, I had thought that one of the perks of this assignment was that Archie would send me the photocopies of the text and artwork of the "Born to the most noble..." page separately. Sadly, most of the artwork was decidedly unremarkable. So it's somewhat gratifying that for the final time I get to use a review copy, I got to see some artwork that makes slogging through all the other stuff entirely worthwhile. It's a picture of Knuckles looking on somewhat reproachfully at two different elements of a tableau: one is a photo of Athair as a boy with his mother, Janelle-Li (who, we shall learn, was one of the few female Guardians, if not the ONLY one). The other is a scene of the older Athair with his mother who is presumably on her deathbed. As we shall learn, this scene never took place. And yes, I AM making a GIF of this scene available on my Website; this kind of thing is too good to ignore!

Last time we left the descendants of Arakkis's Tribe (and thanks to those who informed me that the name was based on the spice planet in Frank Herbert's "Dune" books), they were scrambling to avoid being par-boiled in lava just as the Day of Fury was beginning to kick in. Athair takes this situation far too calmly for Knuckles' liking. One echidna, Iago, who realizes that he's literally dead weight for his wife and child, lets go of her ankles and falls toward the lava. And in a dynamite 2-page splash (no, not Iago's), Athair goes into his levitation routine while amending Iago's declaration "Everything dies!" with the qualifier "Nobody dies TODAY!" Not only does Iago stop falling, but everybody else starts levitating upward. Still, floating several inches above bubbling lava is no picnic so Knuckles swoops down, crashes through a lava bubble to snatch Iago, heads back to the cliff, and does the drop-and-roll bit on Iago whose tunic is on fire. Yet Iago isn't even singed, though Knuckles looks a little well done. Yet even THIS is a temporary condition as Knuckles' burns heal almost instanty. Athair schedules a press conference for later to answer questions while he, Knuckles, and the tribe, levitate over the lava: "It was as if the hand of a Higher Power [my capitalization] had lifted everyone out of harm's way," Yanar thinks to himself, "And who's to say that it wasn't, in the form of Athair's utilizing powers even now I scarcely comprehend." Once again, Ken has put a literal spin on the "deus" in "deus ex machina," but it could've been worse. One shudders to think of the cockamamey explanation Mike Gallagher would have come up with...probably something involving a breach of the law of physics utilizing bubble gum and some cat hair.

But let's jump back to a "Find Your Name" column, then do a quick cut back to Constable Remington's office. Remember the Chaotix in the last issue? They were having some fast food when they had to beat feet to Remington's. Apparently, they got caught in the Day of Fury cloudburst but are OK otherwise...that is, until Remington informs them that they're being "deputized" to take over the Guardianship until Knuckles gets back from wherever Athair has taken him. And against Remington's better judgment, the newest member of the group is...Vector's worst nightmare! Why do I suddenly think of the scene with Eddie Murphy in the redneck bar in "48 Hours"?

Back at the tribe's encampment, we learn that the Day of Fury isn't over (though its usefulness as a plot device is, for the moment). Knuckles joins Athair and Yanar and asks point-blank why Athair abdicated his position as Guardian. So the flashback begins...

We learn that Athair's father died when Athair "was but an infant," during Janelle-Li's term as Guardian. We get a sense of deja vu (flashing back to the Knuckles-meets-Sally sequence from "Black and Blue and Red All Over" from Sonic #44) watching Janelle- Li performing her duties (which include, in one panel, apparently giving directions to an Overlander). And if THAT isn't enough flashing back, we watch Janelle-Li abandon Athair and do that "walking through the wall of flames" bit that Locke pulled on Knuckles back in "Fathers and Sons" (Super Sonic v. Hyper Knuckles special). Knuckles recognizes the similarity as well, but before he can get to ask Athair anything pertinent to Locke, the old guy goes on with the story...

Athair apparently had an unspectacular career as Guardian until he experienced his first theophany and met the Ancient Walkers, who transported him to the Tribe. He arrived in time to attend the funeral of Himon, an echidna who held the rank of "mitre" or guide. "Mitre," in case you were wondering, is the British spelling of "miter" which is the headpiece worn by a bishop. He had been leading them to "the fabled land of Albion, from which our kind sprang forth." Hmmm, there's an Albion in Michigan just off I-94, but I don't think that's the one the Tribe had in mind. Athair "recognized his calling" and probably realized that just standing around guarding a Chaos Emerald wasn't exactly a fast track position.

This brought up the question: who was supposed to fill Athair's shower clogs as Guardian? Quick cut to Haven where the Ancient Walkers had arranged a mother and child reunion. Janelle- Li then came out of retirement to act as Guardian and to leave "the Brotherhood." Knuckles rightly asks for an explanation and is simply told "The Brotherhood is what Guardians aspire to...and Haven is where they go." Thanks a heap, Athair!

So we go back to Athair's story, and we learn that being a mitre isn't the easiest thing in the world, either: "The road was long, fraught with much peril and uncertainty...," not to mention lousy weather. Then, almost as an aside, Ken opens up one humungous can of worms:

"Somewhere along the way, I succumbed to the Soultouch when I met the gentle Crystal-La, who soon became my wife. A season passed before she bore me a son, Sabre...."

"Hey, Bevis, you know what that means?" "Uh...no, what?" "It means they did it. Huh-huh, huh-huh-huh." "Heh-heh-heh, heh-heh- HEH-heh." OK, people, time to learn about the birds and the bees and the echidnas--well, the Guardians, at any rate.

Ever since Ken brought up the topic of the Soultouch on one of the lists, I've been thinking about it in terms of what passes for the social life of the Guardians, at least based on Knuckles' experience and what we've seen so far of the lives of other Guardians. Sure, they're born into a noble house (as we're reminded every month), but they also spend their formative years in the company of only ONE parent and in virtual isolation. There's no day-to-day contact with other creatures, echidnas or otherwise, as their single-minded destiny is drummed into their young heads. Then, somewhere in preadolescence or early adolescence, the one parent with whom they HAVE been in daily contact does that David Copperfield disappearing act in the Forbidden Zone, escaping to Haven and leaving the latest Guardian to fend for himself.

Whatever else this system has going for or against it (and I can't think of any school of developmental psychology that would recommend it), it is guaranteed to produce echidnas with NO social skills whatsoever! Without ever having interacted with one's peers, how is a Guardian supposed to form relationships of any kind? The idea seems to be that they're not supposed to; it's been drilled into them that they're to watch over the Floating Island and babysit some huge hunk of costume jewelry to the exclusion of all else. So Knuckles' early appearances, which consisted mainly of his trying to pound the fertilizer out of Sonic the Hedgehog, make some sense in the context of his upbringing.

The inability to work and play well with others produced by this system is bad enough, but it also makes it kind of hard to fill an hereditary office when you've been brought up without having had any kind of stable family life modelled for you. And this IS where one first learns about interactions between the sexes: from watching one's parents. No wonder Locke and Lara-Le's marriage ended up on the rocks: the divorce rate for Guardians must be horrendous! And anyone who thinks that this doesn't have an impact on the kids in the family has been reading too many comic books.

So how do you guarantee the next generation of Guardians when faced with a supremely dysfunctional system like this one? Once again, you get mystical. In this case, Ken has come up with the Soultouch, a device that apparently drives Guardians who don't have a clue as to social relationships into the arms of an echidna of the opposite sex for the sole purpose of mating in order to produce yet one more Guardian before being called home to the Brotherhood. "What's love got to do with it?" the song asks. Apparently not that much, from the look of things.

Of course, the alternative might be worse. For instance, what if a Guardian ever took it into his head to find a mate himself? Let me get the remote here and see what's on Mobian TV:

[NOTE: the following section is rated PG with an advisory of suggestive dialogue. In the interest of promoting family values, younger and more sensitive readers are advised to skip this section...either that, or ask your parents to explain the jokes to you]

CLICK
ON TV there's a middle-aged rabbit with a visible gap between his buck teeth and really bad headfur. That can only mean one thing: we're watching "Late Night with David Letterbun." He holds an index card in one paw.

"Ladies and gentlemen, here in my hand is a copy of tonight's Top Ten List, let's get started..."

[Wild applause from studio audience as the band plays]

"From the home office in Mamaroneck, New York, here are the Top Ten Knuckles the Echidna Pick-Up Lines!

"As you know, Paul, Knuckles is the Guardian of the Floating Island, and since that office is hereditary...."

[Cut to Paul Shavehead, a bald eagle wearing granny glasses with tinted lenses]

"That means he was born into it, right, Dave?"

"Yeah, and that means at some point he's gotta have a kid in order to keep that whole Guardian thing going. And what happens is, usually the old Soultouch kicks in and selects a mate for him, but you can't always count on that sort of thing happening. So HERE are the Top Ten Knuckles the Echidna Pick-Up Lines; heeeeeeeeeeeeeeere we go:

Number 10:[drum roll] "Did you know that 'echidna' is Latin for love puppy'?"
Number 9: "Ever made it with a Guardian before?"
Number 8: "Wanna help me pick out a last name?"
Number 7: "I know the cheat code for 'Unlimited Pleasure'."
Number 6: "Wanna give the ol' joystick a workout?"
Number 5: "Nice set of Chaos Emeralds!"
Number 4: "Bet I know where all your hidden zones are."
Number 3: "If you think my DREADLOCKS are long...."
Number 2: "Do it with me, and I'll make sure Ken Penders never drops you off the side of a building."

And the Number One Knuckles the Echidna Pick-Up Line:

"I'm not as fast as Sonic the Hedgehog, if you know what I mean."

"There you have it, ladies and gentlemen...."

[The audience applauds while the band swings into a few bars of Todd Rundgren's "We Gotta Get You A Woman."]

CLICK

OK, let's get back to Athair's story. And here's where we have to keep the "noble house" artwork in mind. The Walkers tell Athair that his mother and present Guardian, Janelle-Li, isn't "long for this world." Yet Athair's sense of responsibility to the Tribe is such that he won't even leave them to be at his mother's bedside. Like I said, it's a scene that never happened, and now we know what drove a wedge between Athair and Sabre, who apparently went back to the Floating Island in time to attend his grandmother's death and then assume the mantle of Guardian with the help of Archimedes. Can't say I blame Sabre for being ticked off at Athair -- this is something slightly more serious than missing his son's Little League games. Yet Athair's excuse is that it was preordained in The Tomes (which are apparently ring-bound to facilitate upgrades) that he would be the last mitre and that the Tribe would reach Albion in this generation after like 600 years. That's 15 generations, if you count the Exodus's 40 years of wandering as one generation.

Athair then starts bringing the story up to date by saying that there was one difficulty from which he could not protect the Tribe: a big, fat difficulty with a bad moustache. An attack on the tribe by SWATbots left several members, including Athair's mate, Crystal-Light...er...Crystal-La, meeting the same fate as Uncle Chuck and countless other Mobians. But the Tribe has endured, while Athair has occasionally free-lanced at the bidding of the Walkers (including his guest shot in the Tails miniseries, "Southern Crossover," where we first met him). Knuckles says he has a lot of questions, but goes to bed instead.

Knuckles' sleepiness is apparently yet another of Athair's tricks, for he tells Yanar "this will be the last time we speak." So when Knuckles wakes up, it's to the news that the Ancient Walkers have called Athair home during the night, Knuckles is the new guide, and just head east. Swell.

The Tribe heads east and enters the "Kingdom of Mercia." It's on the Brave New World map, but don't ask me where the Tribe was coming from.

Once there, one of the members of the Tribe asks Knuckles if he's seen her two brothers. Remember what I said about the figures in the splash page in the previous issue? I think this is that subplot coming to the forefront. Knuckles at first objects to the echidna lass, Mari-An, coming along on the search until she starts throwing his weight around and he relents. Once the two are gone, however, some tough-looking bots confront the tribe with the news that the "Highsheriff" is recruiting entry-level slaves. Yanar ends up getting thrown into a dungeon with...Sonic and Tails!? As for Knuckles, who split from Mari-An, someone is drawing a bead on him with a bow and arrow, someone who looks like a turquoise Sonic and who's dressed like....let's see, an archer in medieval dress, an echidna maid named Mari-An, a "Highsheriff", and according to the Encyclopaedia Britannica "Mercia" was an ancient Anglo-Saxon kingdom in Great Britain which just happened to include Nottinghamshire. Looks like we're going to forget about the religious issues for a while as Ken takes a moment to buckle his swash.

I can't recall the last time that a story, even a Knuckles story, got THIS complex. Yet Ken manages to keep it compelling despite the extended flashbacks. I don't think we've had the final word on the Brotherhood by a long shot. And what do you wanna bet that the Soultouch ends up getting invoked as Knuckles and Julie-Su continue their relationship?

No Fan Art but there is a Fistful of Letters: plugs for Sonic #58 (Sonic and Tails' first official solo outing) and Knuckles #12. Letters: a fan [who has subsequenbtly requested anonymity] asks how old Knuckles and Julie-Su are (15, the standard Archie comics default age) and what their relationship is; go back and read the part about the Soultouch, I'm sure Ken didn't just throw that in to fill a hole in the plot. Billy "Starburner" Malcolm asks what the Chaotix do when Knuckles is out of town--judging from the last issue, they mostly hang out like mall rats in a food court. We also learn that the bionic parts on the Dark Legion members serve various functions and that some Legionnaires are more "Borg" than others. Speaking of the Borg, the next installment of this story will take place in a Sonic comic where it would appear that the old SatAM continuity has been assimilated to the point of nonexistence and resistance is futile.