Andrews Named Freshest Breath Campus

Wrigley Company recognizes University's national standing

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Having narrowly missed out on the highly sought after designation of Healthiest Campus in the Nation, Andrews University is proud to announce it has recently achieved an equally important honor: Freshest Breath Campus in America.

Sponsored by the Wrigley Company, in partnership with the American Dental Association (ADA) and the Anti-Halitosis League, the Freshest Breath Campus in America designation officially recognizes an institution for “an exceptionally low level of residual odors due to mouthborne conditions.”  In short, the University is being recognized for its continued efforts in reducing cases of morning breath.

One member of the on-site visiting team, Tawanna French, who judged nominations for the award, noted that the Andrews community simply “took it to a new level.”

“Sure, we’d seen some interesting efforts,” says French. “At Princeton, they provide tubes of Colgate in public restrooms and mini Listerine bottles in their food court. But when the newly formed Andrews University Whisper Choir welcomed us to campus, it was easy for us to just simply lean in and enjoy!”

According to University authorities, the Freshest Breath Campus in America label was a long time in the making and is the result of tireless work over the last 15 years done by one individual: Stephen “Gum Guy” Payne, vice-president for the Division of Integrated Marketing and Communication.

“It’s an honor to finally be acknowledged for what everyone here already knew,” says Payne. “That our collective, institutional breath is unspeakably sweet.”

Payne himself has been a single-minded minty fresh-machine, handing out, mailing, locally, regionally and internationally distributing and otherwise ensuring that all members of the University receive adequate access to sticks of gum.

“It’s been a life calling since 1993 when Gum Guy first debuted in a beta, test marketing run on a sister college campus,” says Payne.

Pressed further, Payne acknowledges, “Well, ‘life calling’ may be a bit strong since it’s only been 23 years. But, try this,” he says, offering this reporter a customized version of Andrews University Eternal Winterfrost Eclipse gum that nearly sets my hair on fire. “They only made twelve cases of these and I got them all,” notes Payne, who also collects first-run and experimental products. “It’s not just a racket; I’m a true connoisseur.”

Along with “Gum Guy,” Payne answers to a myriad of gum-toting nicknames, including “Hubba-Bubba,” “Packman,” “Chewbacca,” “Pops,” Chomp,” Smilez,” Tridentian,” “Gumball,” “Sweets,” “Stickerz,” “Wrappas,” “EZ Chew,” “Mouth-Glue,” “Ticky Tease,” “Toothy T,” “Big League,” “Gum Bum,” “Jawz,” “J Fruit,” “Sugar,” “VP Freshy Fresh,” and “Ladders” (although Payne clarifies that “Ladders” is unrelated to his gum distribution campaign).

Still, the University’s Freshest Breath Campus in America recognition hasn’t come without some objections. One neighboring institution believes Andrews benefits from an unfair advantage and has lodged an official complaint.

“The Andrews Dairy obscures odors associated with human breath that might otherwise be detected,” said Charles Spitt, dean of students at Lake Michigan College. “We’re just too far away from the Dairy to benefit,” notes Spitt. “Even so, when the wind is right, we can still smell those ‘fragrant’ cows.”

Also, in a related development, Dwight Nelson, senior pastor at Pioneer Memorial Church on the Andrews campus and well-known evangelist and broadcaster, is using this opportunity to tie in with an upcoming sermon series focused around the “Breath of Life” concept.