“How are you?” is a question we are asked every day, if not multiple times a day, by friends, family, and colleagues. Usually, it is one that glances off and is swiftly answered with an automatic “fine” or “well” and a polite “How are you” in return. These common, often unthought greetings are sprinkled throughout the day. Are you truly “fine” though? Are you actually “doing good”? I hope you are. But it wouldn’t be too bold of me to assume many of us are not. A lot of us don’t tell others when we are stressed. Maybe we ought to.
Stress is a word that I have had a difficult relationship with. I used to think being stressed meant I was failing. If I was stressed, I must not be handling my life correctly. I must have slacked off and am now paying the price. I didn’t use this line of thinking for other people, either. When I saw others getting stressed, I would think they must be putting too much pressure on themselves. How ironic I couldn’t see that in myself. That was before I was in college. Now that I'm in my senior year, I view stress quite a bit differently.
My relationship with stress has gone through several evolutions. In 2019, I bought a game called Celeste. It was an indie game—a game made by an independent publisher as opposed to a large game company—that had been released the year prior. It won several awards in both 2018 and 2019, including The Game Awards Best Independent Game and Games for Impact. I had heard great things about it from friends, and as an avid gamer, I decided it was time to try it out. And try and try I did. Celeste is a single-player platformer game where you play as Madeline, a rookie climber who has decided to tackle Mt. Celeste. Mt. Celeste’s own inhabitants warn Madeline of the many dangers ahead. As the story progresses, the player discovers Madeline struggles with anxiety and panic attacks, which she experiences several times throughout the game. I won’t go into any more details—if you're interested, you should play the game yourself! The goal of a platformer game is to complete a level from one side to the other. Often this is accomplished through repetition. These levels often require well-timed, practiced moves. With the addition of boss fights and an extremely well-written soundtrack, Celeste becomes an anxiety enduring masterpiece.
Why am I mentioning a game while talking about the real anxiety we experience every day? After experiencing Celeste, I went in search of what others had gleaned from playing the game. I came across this video by Adam Miller titled “Why Does Celeste Make Us Feel Anxious.” This intrigued me because, as I played the game, I noted my stress and anxiety levels rising. In most other games, this would make me quit and take a break—but each time I started to feel this in Celeste, I would be driven even more to finish the level. Miller describes in his video that Celeste keeps you playing by complementing the distress you feel from the bosses and music with eustress. “Distress” is what we often associate with the neutral word “stress.” It makes us agitated and afraid, and we often shut down as a result. However, eustress is stress that results in positive actions. Eustress pushes us forward. If you have ever done something difficult but fun, you have probably experienced eustress. It's the feeling that comes when you get competitive in a game, wondering if you can back up the trash talk with actual results. When I learned of eustress and how it worked dynamically with the body, my views on stress in general shifted.
When we get stressed by school, we often become entrapped by negativity: distressed. These feelings are easy to come by, and they pile up throughout the day. Knowing that stress under the correct circumstances, eustress, could be beneficial to me gave me the knowledge to work with as I tackled handling stress in my own life. Those of us with high-functioning anxiety as well as those who go through feelings of general anxiety and stress know that, once you start tipping into that stress, it can be hard to pull yourself up. However, you should know there are plenty of resources around that can help stop that fall and turn your distress into eustress, if not alleviate it altogether. As I said before, I recommend doing some of your own research—but here are a few practices that have helped me: 1) Yoga and/or meditation, 2) Listening to music (calm, instrumental is my favorite), 3) Talk therapy, and 4) Going for a walk.
Stress is uncomfortable. It makes already-difficult situations feel impossible to handle. One of the best ways to take control of something uncomfortable is to gain knowledge about it and fight back in ways that work for you. If you find yourself stressed, start acknowledging your triggers. Try avoiding those if possible. Research and practice different techniques that help calm your nerves. Most importantly, don't be afraid to talk about it with others. I can almost guarantee that those people who you see every day and ask you “How are you?” genuinely care about your answers. Maybe start sharing the real feelings underneath. You may learn more about yourself and those around you simply by realizing that it's okay to not be okay.
The Student Movement is the official student newspaper of Andrews University. Opinions expressed in the Student Movement are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the editors, Andrews University or the Seventh-day Adventist church.